Experience of a Lifetime

(03-28-07)

I was in Negros Occidental for two weeks. Just arrived last 24th of March at home. I just wana share a story that captures my heart in the Islands of Molocaboc, Suyac, Panalsagon and Matabas.

At first I thought "I am sure have a hell of a good time in these islands." only to realize that I will broke my back...este my heart and carry it anywhere I go.

The head of the kids consume half of their total weight. Meaning kay bigat tingnan nga kanilang dinadala. They are so thin. I was able to interview one nanay in the fishing area. She is 24 years old, about my age, with seven kids... yes you read it right, 7. She married when she was 12... not married pala, lived with his boyfriend... They became so masipag that they reap seven kids... Their daily income ranges from P35-P100. You will ready smell hunger in these areas.

When I was interviewing one old man, 72, I saw his feet blistered, lumalabas na talaga ang laman. After I was done with him, I asked him if me kilala pa syang mangingisda na pwede kong mainterview. I am only expecting him to name his companion. You know what he did, he asked me to follow him kasi nga daw dadalhin nya ako sa friend nya. To my surprise, naglalakad sya with the flesh of his feet grilled in the ravaging heat of the sand. We walk past ten houses siguro, he noticed me crying. He asked me, Nainitan ka day? Pasensya ka gid di sa amon lugar ha? Mainit gid man diri. I told him I am okay. What makes my heart bleed is the site of the man walking under the heat of the sun barefooted and wounded yet with very big heart.

After the interview, I bought buko sa taga isla para makapagrelax kami ng mga staff and guide ko.Sabi ko ititreat ko sila para lalong sumipag sa work. Well, for those who knew me for a long time would say morena ako pero pumuputi pag nailawan…hahahaha, pero sa isla ako doon ang pinakamaputi. Hahahaha. Amazingly true!!!

Off we went to Molocaboc Island...what amazed me so much is the sound of the kaldero. Talagang kumakalembang na kaldero coupled with a srilling cry "kan-on, nagutom ko!!!" After a short while, a deafening silence. I saw an old woman na me dalang kaldero and as she walk sa road, mothers and children alike, tumatakbo at binibigyan sya ng kanin at ulam. Wow! I said, what a scene! They are very poor yet they still have a lot to give...

Sobrang dami pa ng experience ko. Everyday I cried...not because I bowel in the mangrove areas, not because I ate all the yucky things I thought have never existed as food, not because I miss home (although that is partly true), not because I was deprived of taking a bath once a day (freshwater is very lean in the island coz they only have salt water supply), not because of the scourging heat of the sun but most of all I cried because I feel so blessed with a lot of good things in life, yet I was never so thankful the way people in those Island thank God with the blessings they have.

I feel so little... I feel so ashamed. I thought I have this red, big heart... I thought my intellect never failed me.. I thought I have one strong body... But I realize, my heart is so small...theirs is so big to give their last drop of freshwater for me to drink, their last samon of rice for me to eat, their biggest catch for me taste and their best of everything for me to enjoy... I began asking myself...what have I given them? My mind runs out of answer.... I just continued crying... Im so sad... I feel so little.

As I travel home, I embraced my sleeping bag for being with me all the time in the islands and for comforting me every dark, humid night.